The 21 Unwritten Black Rules

Jeff and Anthony go over Buzzfeed's 21 unwritten Black rules that white people don't have to worry about. Jeff also shares his excitement about the Brooklyn Nets being eliminated from the NBA playoffs.  Also, the boys place another bet and Jeff calls Spike Lee "fraudulent".

Topics Discussed:

• Welch's grape soda
• Nets eliminated from playoffs
• Jeff rants about Spike Lee
• Can Knicks fans root for the Nets? Jeff doesn't think so
• Timberland boots
• The 21 rules of life that Black people follow that white people know nothing about

Referenced Links:
Black People Are Sharing The Unwritten Rules They Follow That Most White People Are Clueless About, And It's Eye-Opening (msn.com)

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Transcript

Jeff: 0:51

Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, thank you for tuning in to Episode 93 of the culture. This your host, Jeff. Pay. Well, my man was good.

Anthony: 1:02

I don't care. We just had this conversation about you trying to pick me up for a trivia contest.

Jeff: 1:09

Because you're one of the most knowledgeable people like no, I'm good and all the useless information.

Anthony: 1:15

Well, I mean, it's not useless if it helps you when someone can't be through a degree. It's a bunch of random things that got stuck in my head sometimes, but I know I might support the cause. Um, I will say, But yo,

Jeff: 1:27

Episode 93. Man, we almost there. I got to figure out we're gonna do 400 Man,

Anthony: 1:32

what the fuck? You're gonna get like, like, if it's not it's just the number life goal is just given that it's a

Jeff: 1:38

milestone. 100 episodes is a milestone. Most podcasts don't reach don't get to that.

Anthony: 1:42

Man every week. It's a milestone, man. You don't have any time to want to quit this month. I'll go with you don't say that. As a matter of fact, whatever happened to homeboy? Who became the original host, the original host? Fucking talking about? It wasn't gonna be the original co host, then you start trip? Oh, the BK forever. podcast host. Yeah.

Jeff: 2:04

I shouldn't work out

Anthony: 2:05

happen. And how many did it get to? Exactly.

Jeff: 2:09

And hence why I said 93 is a milestone. It is it couldn't wait for the last three or four.

Anthony: 2:18

Well, they don't have much to talk about. I mean, there's plenty to talk about. You really want to put your mind to it. You could. The thing you kind of realize is that the conversation that you generally have, you can just record them and literally make a podcast out of it. Like one day, I'm just going to sit around and I'm just gonna put like I'm gonna turn on like the recorder on my phone. I'll go later to a random competition that we have. And that's just going to be a podcast. I'm not gonna tell you when that well. Yeah, actually my sentiments like, some shit that's banned from TV. Oh, I shouldn't have said that shit. But yeah, I mean, that's the way it goes. Easy conversations make easy recordings made easy pot

Jeff: 2:56

but that's how it is. But that's how this podcast started. It's just us talking shit on the phone, you know, during the pandemic because we couldn't really see.

Anthony: 3:05

Yeah, okay. Two years later the world's still fucked up man. You still trying to make an Alexa? We will 93 What more can a man ask for ask for a lot but you know what I mean?

Jeff: 3:18

We got some shit to get into I want to get into the 21 unwritten black rules so we'll talk about that later. Let's just sounds racist.

Anthony: 3:26

does not trust me if firemen shout out to our patrons

Jeff: 3:30

or aka the coach or crew. Check us out at the culture dot one check out the blogs. I got some new blogs coming out this week. Yes, and every time a blog comes out we do exclusive content on the Patreon page. So become a patreon and you can become a patreon with as little as $3 and get that exclusive content we're gonna break down everything I write about on the blog me and we'll come on to Patreon and we'll discuss it. Last week we was on the simulcast with Mikey and Ren the Mikey and Ren eat in podcast that was dope. Fun on that. The debate was whether Biggie when he refers to Welch's grape, was he talking about jelly? Which I think that's some white shit. Was he talking about juice, which is what I thought it turns out and I'm pretty accurate. I think I'm pretty sure now that he was referring to grape soda. Told you, Welch's granted that I had told him that they have the cans of Welch's grape soda.

Anthony: 4:33

We were on that show. I told you well just makes a jelly, a juice and a soda. Right. And I said the jelly just makes sense, because it's kind of breakfast thing, but the soda does make a hell of a lot of sense. Think about who's eating it. Like if you're at a diner. Like okay, like when's the last time you've been to a diner and actually ordered grape juice?

Jeff: 4:53

Never. I usually drink either ORANGE JUICE or WATER.

Anthony: 4:59

Right, but I can see how someone will order like a grape soda. I can see it I don't know about you, but it's possible. But yeah, like it's it's one of the things are we just gonna let it roll in let it be soda. I think it could be anything is one of them questions where you gotta let your imagination say whatever it says about you will say shit like, they won't see the optical illusion like the first thing you see says something about your personality. I guess whatever answer you give it says something about you what it says I don't know. But it's either jelly juice or soda but fucking they say soda is going to be soda.

Jeff: 5:33

I think it's safe to say a soda. I mean this is very stereotypical for it to be grape soda.

Anthony: 5:39

I say that but I've had grapefruit and fuck a very long time.

Jeff: 5:44

Can we just call it purple drink?

Anthony: 5:46

No, you can't call it purple drink because that's what they call it shit Mexico.

Unknown: 5:50

Ah Do

Anthony: 5:54

you say that until we're going to complete them were like so. So baby was sipping dessert like, Whoa, no, no, no. But you called the purple drink like, no, just, we're gonna say what is great and after that what you want what was great to be it's totally your decision. That's fine.

Jeff: 6:11

But you're speaking on a blog a couple of blogs I got up is or not are having up yet but they're gonna be up as the history of the Timberland boots in hip hop. I wrote a little piece on that I thought that was interesting. Because it just dawned on me you know, I'm saying like yo, Timberland boots is a main state in the hip hop community. And then when you start going back and listening to some of the lyrics NAS Biggie it goes on and on they all mentioned the boot and they and the lyrics you know, I'm saying like, like they took, like originally, Timberland boots wasn't even when they created timberland. It wasn't with black people in mind. It wasn't with the hip hop culture in mind at all. It's a workbook it was a workbook for you know, white colored white evokes certain in I mean, of a certain status. And as like the culture came and just took that shit as our own.

Anthony: 7:00

Do you want to pair to him?

Jeff: 7:01

I do. I got a couple of pairs in the box. Do I got all black ones and I got the old yellow ones, which I don't even think I've ever worn. I just got them in the bike

Anthony: 7:08

don't. I used to them. She's uncomfortable. And they heavy. Like for the ankle. They'd heavier. Oh god heavy shit.

Jeff: 7:17

I think people in Florida rocking them shoes. I'm like, Damn, it's too hot in Florida be rocking Tim's?

Anthony: 7:22

What Wear ankle fattens

Jeff: 7:25

shorts. Yeah, it'll be like, fuck,

Anthony: 7:29

bro, I think I think people were in Tim's on the beach. And I'm like, this is creative. This is creative. Water real quick. And no, you're not, you're going to miss a bit sweet.

Jeff: 7:45

Remember, when we had they haven't been back in the day, we used to be in school with a little brush. It was a timberland brush, it would have an eraser on one side, it'd be the suede brush on one side. And then we'll have like the eraser on the other side. I'm like what the when people act like they was cleaning a booth, I'm like this is really do anything. You just look what we're doing

Anthony: 8:04

is we're all agreeing to go in one direction. But it don't matter. Once you just get soaked up wet. In once you're broken into rap.

Jeff: 8:12

Another blog, I'm gonna get up as the top 10 Best wrap flows of all time. And I know you definitely want to talk about that. So we're going to discuss that once I put it out. And then we'll have it for the patrons.

Anthony: 8:25

We're going to argue about it. And matter of fact, no, it's not going to be a lot of argument because I think it's a preference choice. Because flow is different from ability and different from lyricism. Some people have really great flows, and aren't great lyricist. They're good lyricist, but aren't great. But just how they said and how they

Jeff: 8:42

I don't think you'll I don't think you'll really have a much of an argument for my list. You know, I'm saying like, I think everybody that I have on the list deserves to be on it, you might just have a summer about the order that I have each person in, you know, I'm saying, that's, that's personal preference. But ultimately, we know who the best flows, flowers of all time are like, for the most part, I

Anthony: 9:03

mean, like, it's, it's like when it comes down to any kind of list. And so it's gonna be a difference of opinion, nothing more than less. Like, gonna be from the way that you see the world. It's going to reflect the way you have your changes, like, Let me guess Pong is going to be an elective course. Is your mind. Yeah, I thought about it. Yeah. But I mean, I need to bump from and off. So it's one of the things where you got to kind of bounce back and forth between this guy or that guy, or this guy or that guy.

Jeff: 9:34

Another thing too, is it's so hard, man. Another thing too, about, you know, lists like that, like the best flows is a lot of the rappers we like we're inspired by whoever they like, you know, I'm saying Whoever their idol was, I don't want to give it away. But you know, I'm saying so there's a lot of guys that either I had told me or you're not. I mean, it was I was torn whether including them because there's other people on the list that either have similar styles or that were influenced by particular people, you know, I mean, so like i Who's better than who, you know, but anyways, you know, real quick before I forget, the nets got eliminated from the playoffs from the NBA Playoffs. Yes, they did. You know how I feel about this. They were doing that. Yo even up until like a couple of weeks ago, they were still the favorites and Vegas to win the whole thing, because they have Kevin Durant and Kyrie Irving two of the best offensive players in the entire history of the NBA. And then they go up against the second seeded Boston Celtics who came out of nowhere. And not only did they lose the series, the Brooklyn Nets got swept.

Anthony: 10:39

I don't know if they came did a second seed it didn't come out of nowhere.

Jeff: 10:43

They wasn't even they went all the way from like eighth all year they were like eight seven a they lost to the next a couple of times they got you know I'm saying like all of a sudden they need work. All they worked their way up slowly all the way up till

Anthony: 10:56

they had to run when he loves double digit games in the room getting one double digit games in a row like it fell apart and he built it back up.

Jeff: 11:03

To get them they just put it in perspective after I think after the first 50 games, the Knicks had a better record than the Celtics. Turns out the Knicks didn't even make the playoffs in the Celtics ended the SEC and finished off the second seat. So that tells you what type of run they went in in the second half.

Anthony: 11:20

Absolutely. No hesitation.

Jeff: 11:22

Yeah, they're good team. They're very good defensive team, which is what I knew that the next floor was going to be they played zero defense. Absolutely zero we've been with wonderful when they lost. I was so happy, you know, and I've come on here and I've said it before. I've never hated a team in any sport more than I do this Brooklyn Nets team. And it has nothing to do with the actual name of the Brooklyn Nets is the personnel on the team is the Kyrie Irving's is the Kevin Durant is the James Harden's who they traded for Ben Simmons was another guy I hate him say, and then the fact that the organization is allowing the inmates run the asylum, they don't even have a real coach. They let these guys put Steve Nash in place to let them do whatever they want, is really the, the KD and Kyrie show and Kyrie missed most of the year because he didn't feel like getting vaccinated and then during the playoffs, you know, one of his excuses was that you know, he was fasting for Ramadan or whatever.

Anthony: 12:19

I'm like what and that's fair and that's fair. Yeah, but I can't

Jeff: 12:23

right but I've never heard that is all of a sudden carry you know Muslim now or what because I've never heard that before that he was fasting for Ramadan all of a sudden when they lose that's an excuse

Anthony: 12:35

he's a very Oh no, it wasn't excuse because you post do whatever he's supposed to do. He does a very interesting person so good for Kyrie good for the nets. I don't care man. Like I just don't got the time and end up hating him like y'all lost like y'all should have played better you traded forgot who does even want to show up all season who's sitting there just like a pack of Skittles and talking about some I think the quote when something about loads the the and I'm not going to fault the guy's treatment for mental illness is like the guests the anxiety of that caused the pain in his back I'm like to say you don't want to play man. As a matter of fact, don't give them the opportunity to idea like if you if you can play play, but if you can't Don't even be in a bench but if you want to sit in the bench, just dress just be a part of a team you just you know you sit at the end of the bench he's sitting right in front of it like bro like I need you all the way down there at the end of the 15th man were you off camera he's like he's three seats down from the coach just sitting there wearing glasses and coat and custom fits and shoes just weird but I try again next year. We'll see what happens. Do I care? No. I just hope to get it sorted out

Jeff: 13:43

actually had a $50 bet with some gentleman on Twitter. His name is Shawn on Twitter. His name is positive Shawn has hashtag is at 51 underscore yogi. I need this man to pay me my money. This motherfucker is hasn't paid me my money. The bet was that the nets were not going to make it to the finals. For some reason. He thought that the nets were going to breeze through the Eastern Conference and make it all the way to the finals. And I told him no and I put $50 on it. They lost in the first round. I'm like yo get my money. He's been MIA. Shawn stop being a little bitch. That being a sore loser motherfucker. Cash App me Zell me Pay Pal me? Who N Mo who is this? I don't know who the fuck are from Twitter. He needs to pay me my money though. I want my $50

Anthony: 14:26

brush. Oh, it might be about the life Don't be talking to

Jeff: 14:30

you about that life than you pay my money. Look, man,

Anthony: 14:33

don't don't be talking about tough shit. And don't be making bets with random people on Twitter who ain't gonna pay you? Because if I lose, I pay up. Yeah, when people you know, pay Oh, you're gonna do delete. I'm gonna delete his account. You're never gonna hear from

Jeff: 14:46

the guy shooting the leader because we in a group chat together. He's active. He talks a lot of shit on there. Just pay my money show that.

Anthony: 14:53

Why are you talking about everything except for my money?

Jeff: 14:55

You know who I am upset about? Who spike fucking

Anthony: 14:59

Lee. You shouldn't be and I'm gonna explain why this motherfucking

Jeff: 15:03

guy had the audacity, the unmitigated gall the nerve to attend a Brooklyn Nets playoff game against the Boston Celtics. And he sat there with a Brooklyn Dodger hat on. And he sat there with a Jackie Robinson jersey. So he didn't have technically he didn't have any nets memorabilia on he had Jackie Robinson and Brooklyn Dodgers. And I get it. He's from Brooklyn. This is the man that made the movie Crooklyn. He's a very proud member of, you know, of the borough of Brooklyn. He's a Brooklyn okay. He was actively rooting and passionately rooting for the Brooklyn Nets. Okay, if that is not the most fun Argent shit I have ever seen. I was disgusted almost spell my TV when I saw this shit. You can do that. I went on Nixon. I went on next Twitter and we're all saying Yo, Spike Lee from this day forward, you are no longer a member of the Knicks community. You can that's fine. You're from Brooklyn, you want to be a Mets fan, you are now a net fan. You cannot be a New York Knicks fan. And also be a Brooklyn Nets fan. You just can't do it. You just can't. It's like me going to a Mets game and actively cheering for the for the fucking Mets. When I'm a Yankee fan, like I don't hate the Mets. I'm not gonna sit there and go to the front row and one of the games spent 1000s of dollars like he did for the Brooklyn Nets and sit there courtside. And you know, it was worse. You know, when you go to the games and they go around and he's showing you who the celebrities are in the house like the who's who? They ignored him. The Brooklyn Nets organization ignored his ass. Who's in the house. This guy's in the house, Mary J. Blige was in the house, Jay Z's and this guy this guy. They did not show him they didn't feature him on the big screen like oh, we got Knicks fans Spike Lee in the house. Nope, they ignored his ass because he's a fucking fraud. So fuck you, Spike Lee. You're a fucking fraudulent piece of shit. And I'm done with you.

Anthony: 17:15

Don't forget what spike did to you kind of confusing me.

Jeff: 17:18

He's a fraud. Okay, let me ask you this. When you think of Spike Lee, what what's the first thing that comes to mind? Malcolm X. Keep going was the second and third thing.

Anthony: 17:29

It said the first thing about x. Malcolm X Kirkland, the Jordan commercials been foolish and somewhere along the line.

Jeff: 17:37

Being a Knicks fan is like top three when you think about the Spike Lee

Anthony: 17:41

know if you'd like if you ask some random person who think about Spike Lee, like if you think of my history, and frankly, they might think of Mars Blackmon like, gotta be the shoes gotta be the shoes. Or like, it might be his movies. But him being a Knicks fan is important, but it's up there.

Jeff: 17:54

It's the top three,

Anthony: 17:55

it's up. I mean,

Jeff: 17:58

he is synonymous winnings with his goofy objects.

Anthony: 18:01

When you think of Jack Nicholson was the first thing that comes to mind.

Jeff: 18:05

I think of Batman Joker. Right. And

Anthony: 18:08

Jack Nicholson has been courtside to Lakers for ever forever.

Jeff: 18:13

Yeah, but he's ever Yeah, but Spike Lee is front and center at every game with his goofy as Knicks colors. Were in all types of Outlanders Nick shit. So definitely goes to every game that he points to the draft

Anthony: 18:28

as a Knick fan, right, next, His home is Brooklyn. It's my home. And like I

Jeff: 18:33

said, and then go be a Brooklyn Nets fan. What let me tell you another question for you and be honest. Okay. In the borough of Brooklyn, New York. Do you think there are more knick fans or net fans? Knicks fans? Exactly. He's exactly nobody gives a shit about the nets not even in Brooklyn. So for this man who's a lifelong diehard Knicks fan who represents the Knicks he's damn near a member of the organization to go out there with his Brooklyn colors. Front row after paying 1000s of dollars for floor seats, and actively room for the fucking team.

Anthony: 19:10

Wearing it was shame Jackie Robinson I'm from Brooklyn. I get to represent Brooklyn. I'm representing checking crowd with quiet

Jeff: 19:18

Lido do it quietly. Or Nick? You are a nick?

Anthony: 19:24

No, I am a Knicks season ticket holder who was a massive fan. And obike Here's here's the thing about Nick's fandom and this is why it's kind of hard to nix because they're fucking idiots. You're gonna tell

Jeff: 19:35

you're taking offense to that

Anthony: 19:38

benefit. You can't tell Spike Lee you're no longer welcome. Y'all can't afford his seats. They go by Seaton if you say you know I my biases.

Jeff: 19:46

I didn't say get up and I say don't attend the game. Attend the game sit there. Have a drink or two. But you're

Anthony: 19:52

trying to take your no longer Whoa. He was there when he was there jumping

Jeff: 19:57

and screaming and ruin like he was at the next game.

Anthony: 20:00

It was a good game. You don't get that kind of feminine Knicks games. You know why? Cuz they are fucking losing Fuck him. It's the only player. It's the only player factor. He goes see in what? The Melo years

Jeff: 20:10

it's fraudulent. You know how I feel about fraudulence? He's it's fraudulent behavior. I don't condone it, I'm done with him. And I am glad and happy that the Brooklyn Nets are eliminated from contention. And they got swept from the fucking playoffs. And I hate the Boston Celtics. I'm not going to root for them. But I was happy that they won now they can go lose to Milwaukee whoever the fuck I'm done don't

Anthony: 20:31

gotta rueful you got to move them to get to enjoy the game. I'm not gonna root for both and I just wanted to watch have a good game. I wasn't rooting for Brooklyn. I just open the games are good. They were I'd like to say me personally, I'm not invested in sports like that in the market that should don't make you happy, sad and nothing just is entertainment. It's like, it's like going to a movie and like come out of the movie. Have you ever to somebody I was like, Man, this movie sucked. I mean, and then you could do it but it's done that like me sit here like ranting and raving and so it's it's like the draft like people were excited because the Giants got to top tier guys with the two first round picks, but then the rest of the draft people were bitching about it. I'm like, You guys aren't gainfully employed by the New York Giants you guys aren't fucking scouts like everyone has an opinion for some shit they don't do but they're entertained them like let them entertain you when you take this YouTube person gets like we're like, oh my god. Spike Lee. Man spike trust me. They can say that shit I want I can tell you one person I guaranteed on give one good damn that about that. And that's likely because guess what opening night he can be in that same seat or in the same Nick stuff. Doing the same thing. Same jersey, same bat time, same bat channel because he's New York. And he's a Knicks fan. But his heart and soul belong in Brooklyn. He just showed up to what else is going to do watch Knicks highlights she when

Jeff: 21:52

he shows up at Madison Square Garden, he's gonna get booed. I'll tell you that right now.

Anthony: 21:56

We'd like to bet five hours right. So okay, so five hours opening night? Does he get booed?

Jeff: 22:03

He's getting booed if they announced him like if they actually acknowledged by Glee and show he's gonna get booed. Even if it's playful booing, but he's gonna get booed.

Anthony: 22:11

$5 I bet opening that deal.

Jeff: 22:15

Is episode 93 Right so 93 All right. Let's

Anthony: 22:18

make a note of this shit. My phone Jeff. will owe me$5 sign dollar sign dollar sign. Ep period nine three. Got it. Okay. All right. Well, let me know where you live. I were able to come up short on my money. I know your mother. I know your father. I know your sister. I know your kid. Come watch one of my foster. What happened?

Jeff: 22:38

You're trying to throw me on airwaves.

Anthony: 22:41

You destroyed homeboy. Kids. You're gonna fuck you up like man don't threaten that man. He gonna shoot you.

Jeff: 22:47

Fuck Spike Lee. Anyway, let's take a quick break. When we come back. We're gonna get into. We're gonna get into these 21 unwritten black rules that white people don't know that black people have culture. Thanks for listening to the culture podcast.

Anthony: 23:01

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Unknown: 24:50

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Jeff: 24:57

Yo, and that was a good fucking rad read, bro. That was a great commercial, bro. Thank you that education is really paying off all better than like what Floyd Mayweather would have did. We had him read some shit.

Anthony: 25:09

Yeah, he knows that's his his his verbal. Yeah. I can I can imagine if you took that said to what his like his verbal scores would be themselves to be wild. I'm not gonna knock that man and tells me because he's very rich. And all he needs to read is like decimal points and commas and he's been pretty good at that. So good for him. But thank you, thank you. I try. I try. I really do.

Jeff: 25:29

But yeah, we're gonna get into these 21 unwritten black rules, and you can vouch for them or you can you know, agree or disagree.

Anthony: 25:38

I'm going to read probably 99.9% of them trust.

Jeff: 25:43

So this was provided by Buzzfeed. I came across this and it was the 21 unwritten rules that black people follow it Every day. And let's just jump right into it number one, by anonymous and it goes, no matter how angry you get you try and remain calm. If you raise your voice even a little, regardless of what you say, or how you say it, you are instantly labeled an angry black man or woman and judged wrongly, even when you're right. How do you feel about that? How accurate is that? Yes.

Anthony: 26:14

Very, can? Well as men, they generally say that men can't show emotion, you can't show emotion when you're black. Because if you're black, they think it's going to be an issue. Like, they think that black rage is the person any other kind of it. So when black people get mad, they think that something violent is going to occur. So it's something you always have to kind of hold in and hold back, just in case. So we always were not only biting our tongue, we had to kind of hold back those emotions and feelings because just as how society has it, because we act react a certain way. We're only just perpetrating certain, I guess 50 personalities, just that they're saying that you are this angry? person. And this is what you are and how you are. So yeah, trust me, that's true.

Jeff: 27:00

An anonymous Black Business Woman quoted as saying, as a black woman is frustrating to see that black women are seen as angry, aggressive, combative, and difficult when disagreeing about something. While white peers are seen as passionate, energetic and spirited debaters is disappointing, unfair and can have a serious impact on one's career. That's a valid, true as valid, I think every like, especially like a fortune 500 company or big companies that have you know, not diversity issues, but that want to be all inclusive. They should have like, meetings or even tutorials or classes where they have, you know, I mean, seminars, even where they talk about shit like this. Because even if it's a lot of like, covert racism, there's things that white men and women probably do or say that they don't even realize they're doing or saying, you know, I'm saying, shit, I feel like there's a lot of that that goes on, especially in workplaces, where they'll say some shit where they don't even realize how it could come across to a black person, or to a minority.

Anthony: 27:58

You ever had sensitivity training?

Jeff: 28:01

I don't think so. But I think everybody I think everybody needs us to do

Anthony: 28:06

our thought sensitivity training was bullshit, because it's not aggressive. It's not super passive.

Jeff: 28:12

Because it's teaching how to be sensitive, not aggressive.

Anthony: 28:14

Right? But the whole thing is that the problem is that it's not the actual aggression, like, as in harsh and violent and reactive, and so on so forth. It's not the problem in regards to questions, the problem where we really come to that they don't really get out and really allow, especially people of color to speak on, like, the microaggressions that go on. Like when they say things about your hair, your dress, your food, or clothing, you're this You're that little tiny things like, like, like, how does your hair curl up like that, like I like my mom is always shrewd, like, it's so textured. And so they say words like ethnic, like, they don't want to say whatever they thought they say ethnic, or like, you know, that smoothly food smell so, so different is so whatever, because it's shit that's like, specific to your culture. And like they say these things and it shouldn't be taken as a shock, but it makes you feel bad about these things that kind of are make you you that identify you as you. And those little things happen all the time. And then word of mouth up a trip out. They weren't like where it came from. These little small little pokes you kept doing until the shit broke open. It happens all the time. And so when black women go through that, when they talk about that, like there's always some story about black woman's hair, or the texture or, or someone needs like, like it was a guy like he had to cut his dreads off or some other shit like that. Which makes no sense but they do it all the time. And then wonder why people snap and then we have to kind of keep our composure through that. That's the tricky part. So she line trust me she lives

Jeff: 29:48

so let's go back to the list. This is once again this is a Buzzfeed they surveyed about like 1000s of people and came up with the top 21 You know, unwritten rules that people of color follow that most white people don't have to worry about so let's go to number two. always asked for a bag and a receipt no matter how small the purchase or you can be accused of stealing How do you respond to

Anthony: 30:13

that? If I pay cash I do. If I do I do and I understand that if I pay cash I do if I pay with a card Yeah, I'm not gonna be like like you stole this like I bought it. Where's the receipt? Can I pull up my phone? Then I thought four people go with it. Dude like are you sure this your phone? Yes motherfucker I pulled out of my pocket. Let me go to my banking app. Are you sure this your bank? Yes. Do you see the star to hit to the maximum that's there yet does? Okay, can you show me some Id like to make sure that this is your phone and this is you see is little shit like that as well. We have to be on patrol but if It comes to cash. I want to receive to make sure that number they have maximum what a number I have here. And I go forward with that if it's a card. Now, don't worry about that. But I'm saying why we have to because we don't want to be confused and seen as a criminal.

Jeff: 31:04

Trust me unwritten rule number three as a black woman in a predominantly white area, I make a point of approaching staff first and stores when I walk in, I asked in an Oculus. Did I say that? Right? And he was question in a friendly high pitched voice even if I don't need anything, they seem to feel safe around me and do not follow me around when I do that first. being followed around stores is annoying shit. You know, there's been times I've had to turn around and tell the worker like, well, so can I help you like, oh, no, you know, can I help you? Like, no, I don't need your help moves in like they see you walking around with a hoodie. It's like I like hoodies. And I don't know, I don't know when, like hoodie became the attire of criminals. You know, I'm saying according to whoever. But when they see you walking around, you walk around with a hoodie. They're ready like red flags. And

Anthony: 31:53

yet I'm good old days. You know what I used to do it. Like when they were following me around the store, like and I know they would be I would like stop for a minute. And like, take a like a little quick sprint towards the door. Like three times they did. Yeah, and I like I'm just about to run over to the section. I swear I've done it a few times, just to see the reaction to happen. They followed me around the store. I just kind of stood still and just took up like on a dead sprint towards the door. And like, twice the lady chase me at one time to do chase me. I didn't go far. It was only like, like, like sort

Jeff: 32:28

of racism on the focus.

Anthony: 32:32

Yeah. And I went right back to shopping. But like now when I go to thrift shop and people, if I got a question for you, you work here. I'll ask you. You don't need to ask me what I want. I know what I'm looking for. And when I tell you that you will know you will know not me. I'll call you don't call me. Exactly. Speaking of racism, you'll I finally Are we finally started the Fresh Prince of Bel Air Show. Bel Air. They're gonna shut the fuck up, bro. It's the season's over like, bro, like we just started like, go ahead. Go ahead. Go ahead.

Jeff: 33:02

They're not gonna let Will Smith start Season Two anytime soon. So I have a lot of chance to catch up now. Anyway. So the very first episode where they show Carlton and he's you know, he's an Uncle Tom coonass character on the show, whatever. Right and all his friends is white. And he's like, the only black person in the lacrosse team only black person amongst his circle of friends. Right? And I thought about you, I was like, damn, I wonder if this is cringing as much as I am when I saw the one scene where there will walks into the men's locker room. And Carlton is dead dancing with his white friends. And I forget what's the song that they're fucking singing to when the white dude is singing? It says a rap song. And he's saying the N word N word N word n words and that. And Will's like, Yo, what the fuck, bro? It gets into her to do it. And Colton is like, Yo, what are you talking about? Man, like leave and was like, Yo call to her. You're gonna just let them say the N word in front of you like that. Like it's cool. Call it says like, it's just the word, bro. Like, you know, black rappers have been selling this shit to the white, you know, to white boys. their whole lives? And are you getting mad at them for saying the word that they're listening to in the rap songs like? And that whole scene was just made me cringe? How'd you feel when you saw that scene?

Anthony: 34:14

What is it? I remember when I used to work with Tiffany and Company, I used to enjoy the office party. Because for some reason, they always play a party by DMX. Every time like if for some reason, like let's say a by persons jam. And I was waiting in apart when they were going to slip out. And I will like step back to see who would say it. And they will all kind of freeze up at just that moment. Right? I've been here. I've been here. Yeah. And like, and they go through that. And they do that shit all the time. So the funny thing is this, you go through this process where you try to understand other people. And they take this interest in your culture. But they they try to reason or make rationale for things that they have. It has nothing to do with them. Like the thing we're Carlton like, if if Carlton was Asian, I think he probably rock along with he's black and he rocks along with it. No one should really care. But you should know kind of what it is and no one and reading the room and saying what needs to be said and what shouldn't be said and this is one of those instances. For example, I'm gonna make this quick. There was an episode of Atlanta, the TV show where there is where a guy takes his this woman to a Nigerian restaurant they have Jollof rice never had Jollof rice in their entire life. They're at the time they're in London when they're doing it. So she's talking about how amazing it is the culture, the food is talking about everything else about that and appreciative of the business and so on, so forth. So a couple days later, he's goes back to the same restaurant. And the restaurants close. And our front of the restaurant, there is a food truck, where they're served with the serving Jollof rice with a white woman purchased it. Right. So they have these things. And these things go on like that. And like, the business got closed down, because the white woman and her partner had enough money not to buy it from the people who owned it, but from the landlord who own the property. And she liked the shit so much. They said, Well, we're gonna make a food truck out of it. And they made like, peach infuse rice and some some other function, whatever they did. It's the ability to try to include people into the culture. And then once they go a bit too far, you're wondering, like, why are you allowing this to happen, but it's kind of too late. At that point, the thing, we're Carlton in the show, the things that they do, it's kind of too late at that point should probably step back and realize this is wrong, I need to do something about it. And the thing with situation like that we just read from the list of those unspoken rules, just another thing, you just got to be comfortable, got to be got to be aware of the company that you keep, because these things will tend to happen. If you allow them to go too far. You end up in situations like they did. So. Yeah, it sucks. But we can go on to the next room.

Jeff: 37:10

Okay, the next one. This person said, as a black woman, I usually keep my college jacket in the car, if I have to go to the emergency room, I'll receive better treatment, if doctors see that I have a higher education. Higher, so higher education equals status. Okay.

Anthony: 37:34

It's important, because when people see things, they they make these innovations about who you are, what's your culture, I wouldn't bring forth and it's always the negative aspects. When you think of brilliant people, you generally don't think of people of color. But there's a lot, just as there are many white people and there's a lot. But you know, you always want to kind of Lord Your intelligence whenever you have a chance to I do it. And I thought about it, I do it more as a defense mechanism than anything else. Because when I was growing up, I was always through. Well read, I still like reading to this day. And when I was in school, I was smarter than the white kids and I wanted to sound smarter than black kids. But the black kids would say I talk white they will call me white boy some shit like that does just because I happen to be well read because I happen to be educated. So that was always kind of a sensitive spot for me and it's something I kind of work on now. Because now when I become an adult like the thing that I'm bringing about I'd really try to lower the more people that I really shouldn't I just can't like I tried to help myself but I can't like sit that's that's my own personal defense thing. Like some shit you can't take away from me. You can't take away from like, my, my career you can't take away from my, the classes I've taken the degrees I've gotten, you can't take that away from me. So you get a chance to kind of wear that aren't and short off like that you kind of have to so and I

Jeff: 39:06

never understood that like, you know, okay, I guess the misconception is okay, if they're educated, they're less threatening, right? But if you've got a degree that means your ass Oh, student debt out the ass because Biden still hasn't forgiven these fucking student debts yet. It means you might be broke. So I might want to rob you. Because I gotta pay the student the student loans.

Anthony: 39:30

So if I if I

Jeff: 39:35

just go to the next one. Somebody from but with the hashtag big school Bo for said, I'm from Louisiana, where they still have sundown towns, avoid them at all costs. But if you have to pass through at night, make sure you have a full tank of gas so that you don't have to stop. When road tripping. every black person knows not to stop in a rural area for gas or a pee break if you can help it, especially at night. And then they go on to say I know someone whose child actually peed their pants because the area they were driving through was a sun downtown and they weren't going to risk it. I never actually heard the expression of Sun downtown.

Anthony: 40:12

Because being black is the black thing. There are certain towns in the South that they're called sundown towns because pretty much if you're black, you shouldn't be there. Like it's pretty much like a de facto rule like you're at once the sun goes down. You could be here while it's up. But while it's down No, and it's basically like it's literally as I said it's the sun downtown. So there's places in the towns like like Harlem, we're gonna keep driving the drum

Jeff: 40:36

sounds like one of them horror movies. That was the guy's name Keegan peel or whatever.

Anthony: 40:41

You go Jordan Peele sounds like a movie

Jeff: 40:43

he should think about making call. That's just sundown.

Anthony: 40:46

Yeah, you kind of got to but I mean, it still exists. And I mean, like the difference arc was pretty new, but those talents like I said, those deep D rural South places. I'm just gonna go ahead and keep on driving because I don't feel comfortable stopping here there's no service. There's nobody that looks like me sounds like me, whatever. And like I said those towns exist. And like I said, my time was supposed to be you got to be gone. Because something bad might happen to you. It's not a guarantee, but like, says some small reading town often backwards nowhere. Like if you get lost somewhere who the hell gonna find you? Oh, no one speak up for you. So these are things that we kind of got to deal with and live with as people of color. So yeah, so one of them rules. Not anything I feel happy about, but just how life is me.

Jeff: 41:30

Rule number six when taking a walk for exercise, always walk in the middle of the street, not too close to houses on either side, wear reflective gear and avoid staring too closely at any of the houses. So gentleman said I am a 50 year old black man who lives in a 98% white neighborhood I do not go for walks alone ever. I do not trust the level of suspicion that white residents would have regarding my presence. For example, when kids of color visit our neighborhood to do door to door sales. Someone usually posted a presence in our neighborhood association Facebook page, so that at least I make sure I am walking my dog or better yet walking with my spouse I guess and the Ammar Aubrey case comes to mind

Anthony: 42:11

my own harbored a lot of people coming in. I'm not wearing I'm not wearing underwear.

Jeff: 42:18

Because now you're drawing attention to yourself by doing that.

Anthony: 42:21

And I stared at houses. I'll carry my ID with me wherever I go. If my car might want to roll up but like, Do you live here? Yes. Can you show me ID? Absolutely. Are we done here? Cool. Get the fuck out my face. Because I know someone's gonna call about me and my neighborhood is probably one of my neighbors sent me one of them had to have a conversation about it. But like the Moto berry thing as part of it in the managers running through that they might have what Brunswick, Georgia just and they thought that he had stolen some lumber and they felt they didn't go in and bring out some justice that meant for life he had to get killed. He didn't have to get killed. Actually, it's kind of worked out that way because they barely punished people like that. Even those guys did finally get some time in regards to but this is what we deal with. We got it we have to we have to do beyond extra and be extra just to be safe like water. fuck do I need to wear some bright orange shit or bright yellow shirt? Just a walk from our neighborhood? Does everyone know who the hell I am? So don't die, you know, fed

Jeff: 43:21

testimony number seven goes I was taught to be an overachiever because no one expects a black woman to be smart and well spoken. I'm not expected to have a voice in anything. And many are shocked when I do. They're astounded when I can verbalize my thoughts and opinions and multi syllable words. Melanin and ovaries do not cancel out intelligence and reason. I mean, I don't know what the rule would be on that one. But

Anthony: 43:45

on what the rule would be on that, like they could they could they expect? Like, I guess he split woman, black woman to be like dogs, take care at home, take care of the kids and right like that, then they're not expected to have much to say, oh, shit, really. The next thing we have an opinion about anything listens regarding your spouse or your partner. So like, they're kind of shocked. And like, people get shocked and astounded by me, which I find kind of funny. Like, you speak so well. And I'm like, I'm confused. Am I not supposed to? They blink? Well, I mean, the way you look, I like Yeah, I know. I look me, I get it. But if you talk to me, you feel completely different. Now you talk to me feel different. And I'm not offended by what the person felt. Like I tried to tell them I understand like, from a particular appearance, you would think that someone may or may not be of a particular level of intelligence. I mean, you can look at somebody you don't know what their their brain is. But your your mind formed a particular conclusion about them, like homeless people aren't stupid. Most homeless people are homeless because of circumstances, like some type of substance abuse, alcohol abuse, mental illnesses, why they end up where they are, it doesn't mean that they're stupid, it doesn't mean that they're dumb. It just said, certain circumstances have made their lives and tolerable where they cannot find a livable place to you know, survive. So our perceptions, the way they see things about the world frame things in particular way but in reality, we kind of got to get through these biases. I think that's the point she's trying to make like what you see is what you see and you're gonna put your shit upon me, but that's not who I am. I am intelligent. I am a parent I am a woman and I am black like for you to think anything otherwise requires a conversation but you don't want to have that. So it'd be

Jeff: 45:36

rule number a and I think we're going to both agree with this one. When being pulled over by the police pull your insurance and registration out of the glove box and keep it ready on your seat. That way you do not have to reach in the glove box when the police are at your window. I think it's safe to say that we both agree on that one.

Anthony: 45:56

Yes and then to the problem having to America.

Jeff: 45:59

Alright, number nine is never ever put your hands in your pockets while walking around the store. If you don't want to give them a reason to follow you around or call the police, your hands need to be visible at all times. He was just talking about going into stores and being followed around by workers it

Anthony: 46:16

Okay, when you go into a store, right, okay, I think that one might be a little bit old or whoever put up and it was anonymous. But come on, think about this. When you're in a store, I mean, any store your hands generally never in your pockets, get your hands problem in your phone, right? Like with, like, if someone is walking around a store, we're both in the hands in their pockets. That shit looks suspicious. Like you're not walking freely. You tuck it in both pants just whistling Dixie like what the fuck is still doing that strange? So having both in your pockets like that's just somebody that might be a little bit too paranoid. Like that's how it's done. There's still some shit in the past.

Jeff: 46:53

Number 10 as a black man, never get into an elevator with a woman alone. Always wait for the next one.

Anthony: 47:01

The fuck I will I got if I'm running late for work. I'll give a good guy damn who in that elevator? A lot of white lady. Excuse me Miss fourth floor three three. Thank you. Yeah, I should we should people gotta relax, man like getting an elevator. Like it's an elevator. It's not like as dark like, I mean, you mean the terminal you can sexually assault this person in less than 10 seconds. And if you're already doing that, thinking that you're fucking criminal, like, you probably shouldn't be around anyway. But I'm not doing that. Like I need to go somewhere I need to go swim. Oh, that's it press flow for I gotta go

Jeff: 47:34

through 11 is about code switching, making sure to act. So you're not labeled as ghetto or whitewashed, you know, with whoever you're with.

Anthony: 47:44

You never cold switched Of course. And like I said, and we're the only people that can do it. Only people of color have to go through my

Jeff: 47:53

flow is I don't think I don't cold switch enough. Especially like if I'm in the work place. Like I've been told, you know, I come across as unprofessional sometimes or not professional enough. Because I don't it's probably because I don't coach switch enough. You know, I'm saying like I tried to quote unquote, keep it to Rio and and just be myself. But I can't be in a work in an office setting talking about yo, yo, this yo that bro

Anthony: 48:16

your walk walking example. Keeping it real goes wrong word. Like, it's, you know, I don't call a switch I work. I don't change my voice. I don't change my tone. I'm just aware of my words more than anything else, but I'm not changing shit. I think that's that's something that we have to break. You don't have to seek acceptance by being what the ones above you want you to be. You have to stand out on your own in your own way. That's what makes you unique. That's what keeps you in power. By not dealing anybody else is so exceeding everybody else. So you can call switch. Like the only time honestly I've ever called Switch is really whenever going to Job Interview outside of that. No, I'm the same exact person here as am on the phone, or dealing with clients or dealing with my bosses is I'm not changing up shit. Because you're expecting to be something that I'm not I'm not going to tap dance for y'all. Just to make you feel better because it's gonna make me feel worse and to be honest and truthful about who I am and what I am, then I'm okay. So you ain't got to call us which just got to kind of deconstruct a little bit.

Jeff: 49:24

So the next one gentleman by the name of JoJo bunny says no matter how cold or windy it is, my hood stays off and my ear buds stay off my ears.

Anthony: 49:34

Gonna stay cold if you want to go it actually goes

Jeff: 49:36

back to hoodies being threatening attire. Alright, number 13.

Anthony: 49:42

Can I read it? I like to do it. As a as a black man who loves Hip Hop I often have to send to the music that I listened to. So I won't be judged as

Jeff: 49:52

your hoodlum. Listen to that gangsta rap

Anthony: 49:56

look at that who live listening to Jay Cole like why this brother subconscious conscious music

Jeff: 50:03

NWA Fuck the police

Anthony: 50:07

the whole thing is like if people don't like you and they don't like your music, no matter what form of hip hop you play for them they're not going to like you and they're gonna label you a thug and whole thing is not even labeled a thug it's more like when I uncensor and shit I guess it's more like I think the more I guess quote unquote ghetto thing is that when you play certain music driving around at almost ear shattering decibels like I get it like on an open road I get it but like we just driving down the street and I can hear your shit two blocks away like man for me and like for your own like your health like turn that shit down.

Jeff: 50:41

I number 14 Reminds me of Emmett Till Emmett Till situation so many years ago. If there's a white woman in line, you stand back far enough so you can not touch her by mistake or be accused of touching her. As a black man, of course,

Anthony: 50:55

I get where the historical purpose of that comes from. I'm never going to do that. Because when I've been lying, they'd be right the fuck right on my back. And they don't say a word, they don't back up, they don't do anything. I'm not gonna send close to nobody in these COVID trees, but I'm just saying in general, I get the sentiment behind it because you don't want to be accused of anything. But if I'm in a tight space, I'll try to be respectful in the space of the person in front of me. And I won't go to man persons white, black or whatever. That's just me as a person. You should give people ample space. So I don't know how far back I'm not gonna stand 20 feet back from somebody just to get make them feel comfortable. Nah, man, that's my I got a whole cart in front of me. I'm a cart length. It's you a cart? Me. So I'm not going to take my hands with a cart and take three feet back. No, we're good. We're not doing a shoot

Jeff: 51:45

number 15 Remind me of something you just said earlier. My goal is knowing that that I'll be followed when shopping in high end stores that have product related questions prepared for when they invariably asked me if I need assistance. replying with no, thank you. I'm just browsing makes their suspicion jump. And suddenly, I have an unofficial entourage. I'm a college educated black man about to turn 40. But I still have to play these sorts of silly games. It can be very exhausting.

Anthony: 52:11

It can be exhausting. But it's still fun.

Jeff: 52:14

Hey, white lady, I got some questions.

Anthony: 52:16

I told you I played them game, but I took it off running and got shit in my hands. And she said to me, because I just do the shit. Because like I said, I'm saying the inherent racism you think this is I don't know what it is about my color, whatever else like that, that thinks you believe that I can't afford shit. Which is only funny. Because if I go in there, and I knew I can afford to shit, you're taking all your eyes at me. And there's someone else that's white that walks in and they cannot afford the shit. And they end up losing your shit. But it's not me because you got me on camera all the way. From the moment I walk in the door when I walk out. So like a personal problem to me. But like I said, I understand the sentiment. And these are some of the rules that we have to play by. We don't need we don't need to, but we kind of choose to the whole thing is that I'm going to walk in here. And if I can afford some shit to buy the shit, I'm about to ship. If I don't want to buy it, I'm not going to buy it. But the truth of the matter is this. If I didn't go and buy it, I ain't gonna buy it. If you go and try to harass me, I'm going to own this fucking store because I'm going to sue everybody. Because I know what my rights are. I know what I'm capable of. I know, I know what harassment is. And no discrimination is like, I need to know these things. It's a black person in America just in case. They don't think that I don't know. Because I know how these rules go. You can follow me like I said, But whichever Loss Prevention Unit, like your your your store representative don't have to follow me around. If you have store security, which most high end stores do. Their job is to watch me not the employee, their job is to sell me shit. They don't want to sell me shit, not going to buy it. If you make me uncomfortable, I'm not going to buy it. So therefore I get why this rule is important. Like I said, I played it and dance around and shitting myself. So yeah, it's it's one of those things, man, when you black is a bunch of rules you got to live by. It's just one of them things.

Jeff: 53:54

Alright, number 16. And I wonder if you do this, you know, being a social worker, this just testimonies by a black woman who works a swing shift and gets off of work at 11pm. And she goes, I will not take off my badge until I get inside my garage, I need to have a layer of protection to prove I'm not up to no good in case I get pulled over. Have you ever found yourself doing that keeping like your work badge on or whatever your work ID on you. Just in case you have to show it like Look, man, I'm coming from work type of shit.

Anthony: 54:19

So as a matter of fact, when when COVID first happened, we had to do that. Like, because they were like people couldn't go to work, I had to clear the streets. So we had to have our work badge on us at all times just to go like drive around the streets of New York because like I got pulled up a couple of times. And they're like where you're coming from I said, I work for the welfare unit, they like can see you back and showed it to him real quick and let it go on about my way they eventually had to give us letters that we got pulled over that were essential employees, we had to show them this kind of information, understanding the context that she's talking about, because you try not to just you're trying to keep yourself in the most protective environment possible. And part of that is doing things that you wouldn't necessarily do like you want once your day is over the day. So if you want to take all of this shit off, you don't want to wear a badge. You just want to just go on about your day, but you have to do these things. Just to make sure that you know you make it home safely. But that's the kind of society that we live in. And that that it's a real thing. It sucks. But it's how it is. But yeah, I've done it before. Not in the context that they're talking about. But I've had to do that. Yes.

Jeff: 55:24

Well, we got number 17 with meat when meeting with executives a high ranking officials where appropriate attire would be business where appropriate attire would be business casual for others. I wear full business attire. I found that when I dress more formally, I received more eye contact, head nodding and enthusiasm during conversations. This happens consistently. I can see that theta and theta in a room where like you're let's say you're the out liar. You're the only black person in the office or you're not. I mean, you're the one person that stands out looking more professionally. It might make you come across as more accepted in the room as fucked up as that sounds. And I'm saying like, like they might see you as somebody who belongs here like I have a roomful of all white executives, and you're the one black guy. If you show up on any type of way, they're gonna be like, Oh, who the fuck, you know, I'm saying, but if you show up looking formally, they might be like, Oh, he belongs here to type of shit. Even though you are qualified to be there, regardless of what you're wearing.

Anthony: 56:25

It's this whole thing. Okay. There's something I'm gonna say I leave it to the end now, because I noticed three more. And it's all kind of ties into one little thing. I'll make the point about it when you get to it.

Jeff: 56:40

Just maintain don't wear any jewelry sunglasses of the brand where you are shopping in store. I never thought of this. The person goes as a black woman. I've had an employee rip Gucci shades off my head. They were mine, and told me not to stretch the merchandise. God damn, that would have been some fight and shoot right there.

Anthony: 57:01

But just don't put your hands on me. Seriously, seriously? Seriously, just don't. It's not going to end? Well if you don't. Like why fuck do you think that you have the right to snatch T shirts off my face? Like, I get the point like don't wear the brand of the place you're going into like, then should that if I'm going into a Hanes place should I take off my underwear because they might think of stealing or whatever or like going to Gucci place like I'm so I'm just going to take off the sunglasses like, I bought these here from you guys before I came here to buy more things. So to think that all of a sudden I steal these from you. Like I said, that's these are situation when I think about like I don't personally stress about it too much. Because like if you try some shit like that with me, you're going to grab me I'm going to slap the shit out of you, then I'm going to sue you. There's nothing that you have or anything that you can prove that I still just said I still and if you can't prove that my bigger guns gonna look a lot better. And sometimes we really got to hurt people to make them stop the shit to hurt and they wallet having all the seminars and teaching them shit and so it's not really gonna bother them but when we start fucking with a bottom line, it's different. So if that's what you got to come to that's gotta come to but keep your fancy stuff don't I feel bad for that lady that someone tried to grab the glasses off her her head and employee at a police tried to do that. Employee we had the ass kick and then they asked fired but yeah, again, it's good. Like say you thought it was gonna surprise like, Oh yeah,

Jeff: 58:27

I'm gonna 20 And this reminds me of my dad. Never let your kids play with toy guns. For whatever reason. I'm sure he has his own Riyadh, I've actually vegan asked him. Now that I'm old. I've never asked him but he never he refused to allow me to play with guns when I was little toy guns. You know what I'm saying? Like, he barely even let me use water guns as a kid like he just I don't know what it was, you know? Maybe because of the violent connotations about it. He just never wanted me to play with toy guns. Obviously. You know, cops are shooting black kids out here because they have Skittles in their hands because they have a phone in their hands. And they think it's a gun. So obviously you definitely don't want them being out in the streets playing with toy guns and shit. In the presence of bulimia. Right? Exactly.

Anthony: 59:10

Kimera, right. Yeah, toy gun in the park, they pulled up in the shot. And these are things that he comes to. And what's 21

Jeff: 59:19

It says finally I find myself begging to get adequate medical care for the autoimmune disease and pain I deal with pain and black folks is viewed much differently than in white people. It blows my mind how a lot of people don't realize that black people get the short end of the stick in health care. That was the last one though, and I'm anxious to hear if you've if you've dealt with some health care with me, you've had the biggest health scare recently during the whole pandemic with the COVID. You know, I'm saying you felt like you were treated

Anthony: 59:46

differently. Now, black women get treated differently all the time. If you check, like the history of like, like, like deaths from birth, like like having children like inadequate like prenatal care, middle care, stuff like that, like not listening to some black women and saying there's something wrong with my body than the telling it's not in it turned out to be something very serious. This is not one of those weird conundrums. It happens all the time. I've known black women who have dealt with it who've had to try to deal with that issue, who had to heal doctor telling them that there's nothing wrong. There's nothing here that that's not paying us all in your mind. It's not as bad as you think it is like you're not feeling the pain that I'm feeling. You're not going through what I'm going through. So that last part is the part of the truth one of the more because they just don't make the care they get it's always sent to a particular glance through particular set of white eyes. I think, you know, you can handle this you can deal with it is fine, like no, it's not like that adequate medical treatment is something that they should be able to provide to everybody equally, but as you can see, through all of these rules, the quality of the issue, there is no equality, we try to frame it in a way that makes it easier. And, you know, make it possible for people to Swallow this pill a little bit easier. But it's not, like I said, we have to create a standard set of rules, not to thrive in America is just to survive, to get by, like none of these things that we're saying are going to make our lives any better, just make some tolerable, but we have to do this. In reality, we don't have to do this. Because one of the things I don't believe in is respectability, politics, respectability politics, is trying to say that if you act, speak, dressed, or behave in a particular manner, it will make you less likely to, you know, be seen as someone who's criminal or so and so forth. Always thought that part was bullshit, I won't change the thing at all, they're going to see you as if they see, you could be wearing the most ghetto fabulous outfit ever. You'd be wearing the cleanest three piece suit in history. Guess what, if a cop has a bad day, and they think they see you going, you know, 55 and 54, they're still going to pull you over, no matter how you speak to them, you're probably still gonna get a ticket. So being respectable to people, it should be a general thing. But to dress yourself in a manner of someone respectable just for people to respect you should never do. Like he was saying the thing about your job. I'm not saying he should change the way you are just changing the ways and mannerisms and patterns of your speech to kind of fit into what they're asking for, but not changing the core essence of who you are. Never do that. Because even if you do do that, they're not going to respect you any more, any less. your skills, your talent, your ability is what's going to shine for all the other shifts gonna fall by the wayside. Just be who you are. So these rules be that we have is for other for them to respect us. So make sure that they don't kill us, again, play that part back, it doesn't make sense for us to continue to do so and for us to live by these rules, but we have to again, just to survive in this country. So therefore, the things that we just read off to you like they're not a joke, these are by numbers of people because they don't want to put their names and information out there for maybe their employer or maybe their friends are looking at this and no think whatever they might have them they have to do in a very quiet and you know, anonymous manner to make you see like, this is what black people and people of color deal with in regards to our clothes and our hair, and our inability to shop and our inability to fucking play with toys for Christ's sake. So these are things you got to go through you got to deal with. So like, these rules are unwritten, but it's kind of weird because reading it so it's kind of written Yeah, I actually there's still things that we have stamp I actually have heard of

Jeff: 1:03:40

people that have like, you know, when you fill out these little bill applications or questionnaires for for different health care providers or Medicaid or assistance or whatever the case, I've heard of people putting that they're Caucasian on the little form, you know, even if they're black, thinking that you know, that's gonna help and in a lot of cases sometimes they've gotten responses faster or they've gotten more help by putting that their Caucasian on the forms as opposed to saying you know, I'm African American or black or whatever, and not hearing back or not getting the proper help. I'm saying that's crazy to think that that should takes place

Anthony: 1:04:13

to my work so next time I'm going next time I take a job for an application I'm seeing white from now on Anthony all sounds like a white boy you immediately for that? Yeah, when they seem to behold everything but I'm gonna least get the interview figured out man.

Jeff: 1:04:29

But yeah, we got to do better man. As Mark Twain said continuous improvement is better than delayed perfection. La Cultura

Anthony: 1:04:36

peace ya'll